Thursday, May 28, 2009

Towel bars are NOT for swinging!

Just when I think life is calming down and the routine seems fairly manageable, life or in this case my daughter decides to throw me a curve ball! So far I have been impressed with her maturity when it comes to the twins. We've had no major breakdowns, she sings to the boys when they cry, gets me a burp cloth when I need, and has been an incredible helper. Just when I forget that she's only three, she does something to snap me back into reality. So this, morning as she was brushing her teeth she leaned over, grabbed the towel bar and decided to hang from it. As I was trying to get her off, explain that she could get hurt, she decided what a fun torturous game this would be for me. The harder I tried to get her off, the louder she yelled, "swing me mommy, faster mommy". Yes, she was not getting that I was trying to pry her little hands from the death grip she had on the towel bar and get her to stop. Instead she decided to look at it is a new found "ride" that was attached to the bathroom wall. I had visions of huge holes left in the drywall of the bathroom, and just when I thought the towel bar would collapse, she decided the ride was over, at least for today...

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

One handed wonder.

I am always amazed at the things I can do under pressure. Lately, I have mastered doing everything with one hand. I can email, cook, make bottles, clean and even help my daughter go potty all while holding a baby! Now if I could only figure out how to feed both babies with one hand I'd be all set.

Monday, May 25, 2009

The writing is on the wall.

I have come to the conclusion that my daughter is going to be one of my biggest challenge's. She is head strong, determined and ever the party girl. We are working on transitioning from a crib to a toddler bed and all in all, it's going well. The crib tent was removed a few weeks ago, one rail half way down last week and now both rails are down. Next week we will turn the crib into a toddler bed. In general she hasn't climbed out but one of her favorite things to do is have a crib full of toys and books in bed with her. I don't mind, as long as she stays in bed. The other day though, she was having a full on dance party in the crib and using it as her very own personal jumpy castle. As I watch in the video monitor I was floored when she leaned over the crib rail and proceeded to grab the lampshade and put it on her head. Yes, the writing is on the wall, she loves to party! I hope my boys will be more mellow. If not, I am in big trouble!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

It's all smoke and mirrors!

I am grateful to all the people who compliment me on how I am handling my new life as a mom of multiples. I am even surprised at how easy I make it look, although I have to admit it's all a facade. Yes, maybe the laundry is done & folded, everything seems to be in it's place, my house is vacuumed and dusted. It's all been completed after the 3am feed. I may look semi okay; concealer, foundation and caffeine are a must! But as many know, appearances can be deceiving. Yes, I am doing it, but I have a great husband and help. Help that in the beginning I resisted but finally succumbed to once I realized that I could only do so much on my own. So as I except each compliment I feel a little bit like a fraud. I may have a smile on the outside and I may look well rested, but truth be told I am a frazzled mess who has had a maximum of 4 hours sleep for the last 6 weeks, have spit up caked in my hair and typically down the back of my shirt. So if I look decent, well rested or have wrangled all three kids up and into the minivan for an outing, it's just because the caffeine has kicked in and I've had a burst of energy, but by 8pm I am a goner!

It's all about choices...

Overnight, I became a mom of three. Going from a mom of one, to a mom of three has been challenging. I was prepared for the fatigue, the constant diapers, burping and laundry but what I wasn't prepared for was the emotional guilt I feel each time I have to chose which child I am going to attend to first. I was advised to go to the oldest child first because she would remember what you do. I have tried my best to give each one the attention they need and in general everyone gets my attention when they need it most. At times I feel everything is just a little too methodical and not spontaneous enough. I go from feeding, changing, burping one baby to the next and then running after my oldest. There isn't enough cuddle time during the day for the babies. It makes me sad to think back to when my oldest was born and how I spent every minute of the day snuggling and fussing over her. I feel that I don't give the twins enough individual time. And for me I am guilt ridden each time I have to choose who to feed first. Of course I go to the one who is crying the loudest and as I feed one, I try to rub the other's head. But it breaks my heart each time one is crying and the other is looking up at me with his big eyes, in despair. As I snuggle & feed the one, I am always am looking at the clock trying to figure how much time it will take me before I can get to the other. This is not how it should be, but it's my reality. I know I am doing my best, but at times I feel it's just not enough and once I add my daughter in the mix, it just makes me feel even worse. I know that this will be a constant battle for me. One that I will need to continually work on. It's very hard to except, but I do get that it is all about the choices...

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Manners no more

Several weeks ago if you came for a visit or stopped by, I was the perfect hostess. Ice tea, coffee, water, something to eat? Something would always be offered. But, now that is no more. If you stop by expect to be handed a baby, a bottle, a diaper, trash or even a vacuum. Then maybe after that is accomplished, you'll get some water. Enter at your own risk!

Friday, May 8, 2009

I love a good photo!

When my daughter was born almost 3yrs ago, I couldn't take enough pictures of her. My friends and family were sick of the constant emails with multiple jpg files attached. I took so many because I just couldn't get "the shot". Now, I have moved on to having someone else take the photos. Last fall Pottery Barn Kids had a promotion and I met an amazing photographer named Amanda Dahlgren. She captured my daughter's personality so well, that I decided to have her photograph our family at Christmas. My husband wanted big belly photos of me, again I called her. So now that the twins have arrived, it was time to have her visit with the camera for some great baby photos. After 3 hours of her persistence and patience, she was able to proclaim that she thought she had some really great shots. You have to realize my house was a zoo while she was trying to work. If one baby was quiet, the other was crying. If they were both peaceful, one would poop suddenly and if that wasn't enough, my husband kept asking "if we were almost done" and my daughter was jumping in circles all over the room on a major sugar high. I am surprised after this last experience she hasn't blocked my phone number or my email address. Amanda was kind enough to email me a sneak peak of what I could expect and now I can't wait to see all the proofs. I have a feeling I will want to buy them all! Check out her website at

My personal best!

So it was off to Mommy & Me Spanish class this morning. Sometimes I get up and am so tired, I wonder how will I ever survive the day. Thanks to a lot of caffeine and the fact that I have no other choice, I just continue moving forward. So this morning, being a little more tired then usual, somehow I managed to get all the kids in the car in less then 15 minutes and made it to my daughter's class only 5 minutes late. Yes, that was my personal best so far. Now being the overachiever that I am, I decided to make a game out of it, because if you can't have fun in life, what's the point! My goal is to see how fast I can get the kids in & out of the car, to and from without any tears. Can I do it in 10 minutes and make it to class on time? We'll see...

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

I don't know when she changed!

About a month ago, I thought my daughter was just a petite, itty bitty thing. Now that the twins have arrived, so small and fragile, my daughter looks like mammoth woman. Her personality has also changed dramatically. Fortunately, we haven't seen any hostility towards the twins. She is extremely sweet and loving, her typical self. But what has changed is that she suddenly has a sense of confidence, a maturity that I did not see before. When did this happen? My first baby, my precious little girl, who is no longer a baby, but a full fledged person with an opinion! I don't know when she changed, it seems like overnight. It makes me so sad because life is flying by. I know once she starts preschool, I will be the crazy mom hiding in the bushes outside her classroom window peaking in...I should be happy that she evolving and growing. Why am I not happy that she is becoming more independent giving me a little more time to spend with the boys? I love that she can now entertain herself with crayons, paint or PlayDoh. So why oh why do I still feel guilty?

Sunday, May 3, 2009

It's just killing me...

Being a mom of newborn twins, I expected to be fatigued and overwhelmed. I can handle that because I know soon enough this period will end. The one thing that has taken me off guard is the stench that is coming out of the nursery. My beautiful fresh smelling home now has the notorious scent of baby poo wafting throughout. I just don't know what to do. I didn't have this problem with my daughter. Is it because there is twice as much poop? Is it because they are little boys and this is a sign of things to come? My Glade scented air fresheners are working double duty and there are not enough cans of Lysol to dissipate the smell. The stench is just killing me! Any suggestions?

Friday, May 1, 2009

It's all about the boob!

So the interesting thing about having a baby is that one of the first questions out of most people's mouths is "Are you breast feeding"? Not, how are the twins, how are you, are you sleeping or do you need any help? I find this obsession with the boob and it's feeding ability fascinating. Almost 3yrs ago, I found the question annoying, intimidating and it would many times bring me to tears. Back then, I was a first time mom, trying to keep up with the standard and what is socially acceptable. I was tired of defending myself for a choice that I really didn't want to make, but after trying every pump and every herb out there, breast feeding was not happening for me. This time around, I made the decision to just go with the flow (literally & figuratively), if it happened great, but if not that was fine to. We have all heard "Breast is Best" and have heard all those breast Nazi's out there basically chanting that phrase. I have read all the articles about how I am not giving my child the best and they will probably end up sicker, fatter and dumber then the breast fed baby. Now really, when you watch all the kids at the playground, do you think that kid can't climb the monkey bars, what an idiot, he must have been bottle fed? I know I don't! So this time around I have a refreshing new outlook. Instead of getting annoyed or defensive about whether or not I am, I just smile and listen. Recently, someone suggested that they send their boob lady over to massage my boobs to help with milk production. Call me conservative, but I just thought that was gross and a little disturbing. So, again I smiled and said thank you for thinking of me. I love the people who declare how the breast milk is so much superior. A majority of these women are the ones who are typically drinking a glass of wine with their meals, and drinking caffeine. The last time I checked, there was no alcohol or caffeine in a can of formula. But what do I know, apparently nothing? So I guess, I just have to recognize because of my choice my children will be the slowest ones at the playground...or will they???

It's all doable...

I know people think I am a loon! It has now become a joke when people come over and notice that everything is labeled and sorted. Every basket in the nursery is labeled; burp clothes, onesies, mittens, booties, diapers & wipes. The toy room is organized beyond belief and my daughter's room is the same. I don't even want to discuss what I've done in the garage...yes, call the therapist NOW! I really don't know when this obsession of mine started. I just know that is has become worse and worse over the years. If you ask anyone in my family if they ever expected this behavior or odd habit from me, they would say absolutely NOT. You have to understand that my entire time throughout high school and college, I was unable to open a blind or a window in my bedroom. Why, you may ask? Well, it's because I was a sloppy teenager and never hung anything or put anything away. So it was impossible to make it to the windows without stepping on something and I just never cared. So I have gone from one extreme to the next. Can you say MANIC?!?

I am finding that this craziness has finally served a purpose. Because of this crazy skill, I am finding each day manageable. Everything I do is very methodical, but it is the only way I am surviving. I have my boys on a 3hr feeding schedule and fortunately my daughter's schedule seems to fit right in. This morning, I woke up at 7am and showered. From there the craziness began. I fed, burped and changed my one son at 7:45am, did the next one at 8:20am, got my daughter out of bed at 8:45am. Bathed and got her ready. Had the whole crew downstairs and ready for breakfast by 9:15am. Decided I needed a Starbucks run by 10am. Packed each one, one by one into the car, drove to the Starbucks drive thru by 10:20am, was home by 10:55am. Did the 11am feed for the boys, followed by tummy time with each one, all while helping my daughter color and paint. Put the boys down for a nap. Made pigs in a blanket with my daughter for lunch, read to her in my bed, got her ready for her nap. Had her down by 1:20pm. Put a load of laundry in, folded the stuff in the dryer. Started the 2pm fed for my boys. Put them on their playmats for some stimulation, folded more laundry. Put the boys in their swings. Wiped down the kitchen, called a friend. I got my daughter out of bed from her nap at 4:15pm. Read her a book, put a Leap Frog video in the DVD for her to watch while I did the 5pm fed. At 5:30pm, my husband arrived, he made my daughter dinner, while I cleaned up. We all sat down to eat, my daughter with her grilled cheese and my husband & I with a meal that I made during yesterday's nap time. My husband gave my daughter a bath while I played with the twins. We switched off and I read my daughter a book and put her in bed at 7pm. Had 30 minutes of alone time my my husband. Started getting the twins bath ready. With the help of my husband washed one twin at 7:45pm and the other at 7:50pm. Did the 8pm feed. Had both boys down by 8:40pm. Folded more laundry. With my husband relaxing on the couch watching some nasty UFC fight, I retreated to the bedroom for some sleep. My husband did the 11pm feed so I could sleep and I just finished the 2am feed. So yes, it's all doable. Thank goodness for my organization skills because I'd never make it through the day. I guess a higher power stepped in and made me this crazy structured freak because if it wasn't for that I'd never survive! Well, back to bed I go...because it all begins again in a few hours:)