Friday, April 17, 2009

Do I Dare???

So now that I am beginning to see the return of my feet, I hesitantly eye the scale in my bathroom. When I first found out that I was expecting twins, I was told to expect to gain about 60lbs. Now I started at 135 and I remember doing the math...that would bring me close to the 200lb mark. One evening I was out to dinner with a friend and her husband, the big joke became, why not just go for it. What other time in my life would I ever have the opportunity to reach that weight. Yes, this is a twisted way to think about the weight gain. But hey, why not? I truly did watch what I ate, stayed as active as I could, but the closer it got to D-Day, the closer my weight came to obtaining a goal that I never wanted to make. At the very end I did throw in the towel and bask in the glory of eating everything under the sun and more. As the bloat and the swelling set in, I realized that there was absolutely nothing I could do. I no longer had control over what my body was doing or looked like. It has been 10 days since the twins have been born and I am slowly shrinking. Slowly is the key word! I am starting to see my toes again, the outline of an ankle. Is that my feet I see? Hello feet, it's been a long time. I really would like to see where I am weight wise. I am afraid though. So do I just do it? Do I just stand on the scale and see what happens? Do I dare? Maybe...tomorrow.