Manners no more

Several weeks ago if you came for a visit or stopped by, I was the perfect hostess. Ice tea, coffee, water, something to eat? Something would always be offered. But, now that is no more. If you stop by expect to be handed a baby, a bottle, a diaper, trash or even a vacuum. Then maybe after that is accomplished, you'll get some water. Enter at your own risk!

I love a good photo!

When my daughter was born almost 3yrs ago, I couldn't take enough pictures of her. My friends and family were sick of the constant emails with multiple jpg files attached. I took so many because I just couldn't get "the shot". Now, I have moved on to having someone else take the photos. Last fall Pottery Barn Kids had a promotion and I met an amazing photographer named Amanda Dahlgren. She captured my daughter's personality so well, that I decided to have her photograph our family at Christmas. My husband wanted big belly photos of me, again I called her. So now that the twins have arrived, it was time to have her visit with the camera for some great baby photos. After 3 hours of her persistence and patience, she was able to proclaim that she thought she had some really great shots. You have to realize my house was a zoo while she was trying to work. If one baby was quiet, the other was crying. If they were both peaceful, one would poop suddenly and if that wasn't enough, my husband kept asking "if we were almost done" and my daughter was jumping in circles all over the room on a major sugar high. I am surprised after this last experience she hasn't blocked my phone number or my email address. Amanda was kind enough to email me a sneak peak of what I could expect and now I can't wait to see all the proofs. I have a feeling I will want to buy them all! Check out her website at http://www.amandadahlgren.com

My personal best!

So it was off to Mommy & Me Spanish class this morning. Sometimes I get up and am so tired, I wonder how will I ever survive the day. Thanks to a lot of caffeine and the fact that I have no other choice, I just continue moving forward. So this morning, being a little more tired then usual, somehow I managed to get all the kids in the car in less then 15 minutes and made it to my daughter's class only 5 minutes late. Yes, that was my personal best so far. Now being the overachiever that I am, I decided to make a game out of it, because if you can't have fun in life, what's the point! My goal is to see how fast I can get the kids in & out of the car, to and from without any tears. Can I do it in 10 minutes and make it to class on time? We'll see...

I don't know when she changed!

About a month ago, I thought my daughter was just a petite, itty bitty thing. Now that the twins have arrived, so small and fragile, my daughter looks like mammoth woman. Her personality has also changed dramatically. Fortunately, we haven't seen any hostility towards the twins. She is extremely sweet and loving, her typical self. But what has changed is that she suddenly has a sense of confidence, a maturity that I did not see before. When did this happen? My first baby, my precious little girl, who is no longer a baby, but a full fledged person with an opinion! I don't know when she changed, it seems like overnight. It makes me so sad because life is flying by. I know once she starts preschool, I will be the crazy mom hiding in the bushes outside her classroom window peaking in...I should be happy that she evolving and growing. Why am I not happy that she is becoming more independent giving me a little more time to spend with the boys? I love that she can now entertain herself with crayons, paint or PlayDoh. So why oh why do I still feel guilty?

It's just killing me...

Being a mom of newborn twins, I expected to be fatigued and overwhelmed. I can handle that because I know soon enough this period will end. The one thing that has taken me off guard is the stench that is coming out of the nursery. My beautiful fresh smelling home now has the notorious scent of baby poo wafting throughout. I just don't know what to do. I didn't have this problem with my daughter. Is it because there is twice as much poop? Is it because they are little boys and this is a sign of things to come? My Glade scented air fresheners are working double duty and there are not enough cans of Lysol to dissipate the smell. The stench is just killing me! Any suggestions?

It's all about the boob!

So the interesting thing about having a baby is that one of the first questions out of most people's mouths is "Are you breast feeding"? Not, how are the twins, how are you, are you sleeping or do you need any help? I find this obsession with the boob and it's feeding ability fascinating. Almost 3yrs ago, I found the question annoying, intimidating and it would many times bring me to tears. Back then, I was a first time mom, trying to keep up with the standard and what is socially acceptable. I was tired of defending myself for a choice that I really didn't want to make, but after trying every pump and every herb out there, breast feeding was not happening for me. This time around, I made the decision to just go with the flow (literally & figuratively), if it happened great, but if not that was fine to. We have all heard "Breast is Best" and have heard all those breast Nazi's out there basically chanting that phrase. I have read all the articles about how I am not giving my child the best and they will probably end up sicker, fatter and dumber then the breast fed baby. Now really, when you watch all the kids at the playground, do you think that kid can't climb the monkey bars, what an idiot, he must have been bottle fed? I know I don't! So this time around I have a refreshing new outlook. Instead of getting annoyed or defensive about whether or not I am, I just smile and listen. Recently, someone suggested that they send their boob lady over to massage my boobs to help with milk production. Call me conservative, but I just thought that was gross and a little disturbing. So, again I smiled and said thank you for thinking of me. I love the people who declare how the breast milk is so much superior. A majority of these women are the ones who are typically drinking a glass of wine with their meals, and drinking caffeine. The last time I checked, there was no alcohol or caffeine in a can of formula. But what do I know, apparently nothing? So I guess, I just have to recognize because of my choice my children will be the slowest ones at the playground...or will they???

It's all doable...

I know people think I am a loon! It has now become a joke when people come over and notice that everything is labeled and sorted. Every basket in the nursery is labeled; burp clothes, onesies, mittens, booties, diapers & wipes. The toy room is organized beyond belief and my daughter's room is the same. I don't even want to discuss what I've done in the garage...yes, call the therapist NOW! I really don't know when this obsession of mine started. I just know that is has become worse and worse over the years. If you ask anyone in my family if they ever expected this behavior or odd habit from me, they would say absolutely NOT. You have to understand that my entire time throughout high school and college, I was unable to open a blind or a window in my bedroom. Why, you may ask? Well, it's because I was a sloppy teenager and never hung anything or put anything away. So it was impossible to make it to the windows without stepping on something and I just never cared. So I have gone from one extreme to the next. Can you say MANIC?!?

I am finding that this craziness has finally served a purpose. Because of this crazy skill, I am finding each day manageable. Everything I do is very methodical, but it is the only way I am surviving. I have my boys on a 3hr feeding schedule and fortunately my daughter's schedule seems to fit right in. This morning, I woke up at 7am and showered. From there the craziness began. I fed, burped and changed my one son at 7:45am, did the next one at 8:20am, got my daughter out of bed at 8:45am. Bathed and got her ready. Had the whole crew downstairs and ready for breakfast by 9:15am. Decided I needed a Starbucks run by 10am. Packed each one, one by one into the car, drove to the Starbucks drive thru by 10:20am, was home by 10:55am. Did the 11am feed for the boys, followed by tummy time with each one, all while helping my daughter color and paint. Put the boys down for a nap. Made pigs in a blanket with my daughter for lunch, read to her in my bed, got her ready for her nap. Had her down by 1:20pm. Put a load of laundry in, folded the stuff in the dryer. Started the 2pm fed for my boys. Put them on their playmats for some stimulation, folded more laundry. Put the boys in their swings. Wiped down the kitchen, called a friend. I got my daughter out of bed from her nap at 4:15pm. Read her a book, put a Leap Frog video in the DVD for her to watch while I did the 5pm fed. At 5:30pm, my husband arrived, he made my daughter dinner, while I cleaned up. We all sat down to eat, my daughter with her grilled cheese and my husband & I with a meal that I made during yesterday's nap time. My husband gave my daughter a bath while I played with the twins. We switched off and I read my daughter a book and put her in bed at 7pm. Had 30 minutes of alone time my my husband. Started getting the twins bath ready. With the help of my husband washed one twin at 7:45pm and the other at 7:50pm. Did the 8pm feed. Had both boys down by 8:40pm. Folded more laundry. With my husband relaxing on the couch watching some nasty UFC fight, I retreated to the bedroom for some sleep. My husband did the 11pm feed so I could sleep and I just finished the 2am feed. So yes, it's all doable. Thank goodness for my organization skills because I'd never make it through the day. I guess a higher power stepped in and made me this crazy structured freak because if it wasn't for that I'd never survive! Well, back to bed I go...because it all begins again in a few hours:)

No longer pregnant and still getting fondled!

I cannot believe it! I am finally getting back to normal and have been relishing in the idea that my body is no longer a free for all when out of the blue I see a hand reaching for my stomach. My one pet peeve from when I was pregnant was the idea that people felt that it was okay to rub my belly as if I was a Buddha. So the other day when I was waiting for my coffee at Starbucks, a woman suddenly reached over and said "how's your abs"? Yes, she knew I had twins and decided it was her place to see if my middle was soft and mushy. As she tried to feel my belly up, she declared that I too will be needing a tummy tuck eventually. How rude, not to mention incorrect! When will the madness end???

She's gonna blow!

Once again, my life has become a world of poop & pee. If I am not changing one of my sons diapers or getting peed on by them, I am running after my daughter to make sure she has used the potty. My daughter & I have come a long way. She has finally gotten over her strip teases, where she totally disrobes, with a diaper full of poo, smeared all over every inch of her bed, walls and herself. Gone is the duct taped diapers secured on her with the footed pajamas placed on backwards and the feet cut off. We have evolved to nighttime pull ups and no tape. The unfortunate side is, that we still have "poopy issues". The main issue is, that she typically poops while she is sleeping within the first hour of being in bed. So as each day passes with out a poop, the bedtime ritual becomes more of a fear. Is this it the night she is going to blow! My husband & I both fear the "big one" and unfortunaltely tonight was the night. After my husband & I both fed, burped & changed the boys we were both anxiously awaiting an early evening of sleep, but as we heard the voice of my daughter yelling from her room, the fanatasy of sleep quickly diminished. So it was back to changing and bathing her and washing the crib sheets. As we worked together we realized that it was almost time to feed the twins again. So yes, my life is all about poop & pee...it should end in a few years, right?!?

The things I love!

Overnight I went from having one child to suddenly having three children. I have found that there have been certain things that have made each day more & more manageable.

I am grateful for the friends who have brought me meals. It is such a small thing but it has touched me in such a profound way. Every few days I "hit a wall". As if someone is looking out for me, it always seems that those are the days that someone kindly rings the bell with a wonderful meal for me & my family.

The gifts of diapers have been another one of my favorite things to receive. If you would have asked me what the best gift ever would be, I highly doubt in the past I would have responded "Pampers Swaddlers". But at this point in my life, diapers are better then diamonds! I just can't get enough:)

Whom ever invented the premade swaddle blankets, I salute you! Those swaddle blankets have helped ensure many good night sleeps or at least decent sleep in 3hr intervals. To me the swaddle blankets are a must have.

I love the Wubbanub. What is a Wubbanub? Well, it's a pacifier attached to a small stuffed animal. The stuffed animal adds just enough weight so if the twins spit out the pacifier, it just doesn't go very far. Another life saver, especially in the middle of the night!

So these are just a few of my favorite things...at least for today!

I did it!

So it's day 16 since the twins were born and today was the day I decided to venture out with all three kids on my own. Over the weekend we had gone to the beach & the park as a family, so I new it could be done...but I had my husband with me. So as the alarm clock went off at 6am, I raced through a shower, fed, changed and burped the twins, and got my daughter out of bed. I helped my daughter wash her face, brush her teeth, brushed her hair, got her dressed and fed her. We were able to accomplish all this by 9:15am. As I piled each one into the car, we raced off to our Mommy & Me Spanish class. Class started at 9:30am. Of course we were not on time and we arrived 15 minutes late, but we got there! The key to my success was to just go on "auto pilot". I knew if I started to really think about the logistics and everything that could go wrong, I would never leave the house. I am amazed that we made it to and from without any tears, especially mine! So now I have the confidence I need to keep going. Today was school, tomorrow the grocery store!?1?

Little men, big men, they're all the same!

Today, as I was changing one of my son's I heard the loudest, most obnoxious sounding fart. I looked around because I thought for sure my husband must have come home and was somewhere in the nursery. As I turned my back to see where the sound had come from, I realized that fart came from the inside of the crib. How could my little man, a whole 5 1/2lbs create such a loud manly man fart sound? I don't recall my daughter ever doing that then or even now. So I guess it's just a "guy thing" and little men & big men are all the same!

I just can't stop crying!

Thanks to my husband, I was able to bask in an early morning shower. As I stood in the shower enjoying every minute of the clean soap smell and the warm water, all I could think of was how fortunate I am. This is a daily ritual that so many of us take for granted. As I began to really relax, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes,and my lower lip starting to quiver. I couldn't stop thinking about all the people in the world who don't have clean water. That is when I knew it was all over, I quickly was turning into sniffling mess. So, I tried to go to a happy place...it didn't help. As the tears rolled down my face, I thought about how my husband took over every feed last night, shut off my alarm clock and snatched the baby monitor from my nightstand. He did this so I could get a full night sleep...and I cried even harder. I thought about how sweet my boys are, and just kept on crying. Then I thought about my adorable daughter and cried even more. Today at lunch, my husband and I were talking and I was overcome with an enormous amount of gratitude and respect for him, and yes, I cried again. This evening we had friends stop by for a visit and after they left I couldn't help think how fortunate that we have such amazing people in our lives and cried once more. Yes, the waterworks are on and I just can't turn them off!

Do I Dare???

So now that I am beginning to see the return of my feet, I hesitantly eye the scale in my bathroom. When I first found out that I was expecting twins, I was told to expect to gain about 60lbs. Now I started at 135 and I remember doing the math...that would bring me close to the 200lb mark. One evening I was out to dinner with a friend and her husband, the big joke became, why not just go for it. What other time in my life would I ever have the opportunity to reach that weight. Yes, this is a twisted way to think about the weight gain. But hey, why not? I truly did watch what I ate, stayed as active as I could, but the closer it got to D-Day, the closer my weight came to obtaining a goal that I never wanted to make. At the very end I did throw in the towel and bask in the glory of eating everything under the sun and more. As the bloat and the swelling set in, I realized that there was absolutely nothing I could do. I no longer had control over what my body was doing or looked like. It has been 10 days since the twins have been born and I am slowly shrinking. Slowly is the key word! I am starting to see my toes again, the outline of an ankle. Is that my feet I see? Hello feet, it's been a long time. I really would like to see where I am weight wise. I am afraid though. So do I just do it? Do I just stand on the scale and see what happens? Do I dare? Maybe...tomorrow.

My week in review...

I cannot believe how fast the last 9 days have flown by. Two weeks ago if you asked me, I could actually tell you what was going on in the world and well, since then my brain has gone to mush. I really have not a clue as to what is happening outside of my “little baby world”. I know taxes were due on the 15th and that the American captain was freed from captivity off the coast of Somalia. Other then that I don’t know a thing about the “real” world. The few things I know right now are; that I have gone through 190 diapers in 9 days, have done 5 loads of baby laundry in a day, have been peed on at least 3 times on in a day, went through 4 baby outfits, 2 swaddle blankets and 1 changing cover pad in just one diaper change. How can that be?!? It is strange how life changes so fast but at the same time can stand so still…at least for me that is how it is!