I just can't stop crying!

Thanks to my husband, I was able to bask in an early morning shower. As I stood in the shower enjoying every minute of the clean soap smell and the warm water, all I could think of was how fortunate I am. This is a daily ritual that so many of us take for granted. As I began to really relax, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes,and my lower lip starting to quiver. I couldn't stop thinking about all the people in the world who don't have clean water. That is when I knew it was all over, I quickly was turning into sniffling mess. So, I tried to go to a happy place...it didn't help. As the tears rolled down my face, I thought about how my husband took over every feed last night, shut off my alarm clock and snatched the baby monitor from my nightstand. He did this so I could get a full night sleep...and I cried even harder. I thought about how sweet my boys are, and just kept on crying. Then I thought about my adorable daughter and cried even more. Today at lunch, my husband and I were talking and I was overcome with an enormous amount of gratitude and respect for him, and yes, I cried again. This evening we had friends stop by for a visit and after they left I couldn't help think how fortunate that we have such amazing people in our lives and cried once more. Yes, the waterworks are on and I just can't turn them off!

A little extra attention...NOT!

The other day I had the opportunity to watch ABC's new Show "In the Motherhood". Although I found the show funny at times, there were parts, I just couldn't relate to. As I watched the character played by Megan Mullally, I was fascinated with the depiction that as a pregnant woman she was able to "work the system" to get more attention, cut to the front of lines and even get someone to buy her coffee. I was reminded of this as I stood in line yesterday, waiting for the elevator at my doctors office. Now you have to understand, I am very, very pregnant. Not only pregnant, but pregnant with twins, so I am extra, extra large. As of recently, belly has began to drop, it is now hanging down to my knees, and there is no mistaking me for anything but pregnant. So, I stood in awe, as the elevator doors opened, I was literally caught up in a stampede to enter. I could not get over how many people appeared out of nowhere and ran into the elevator. Apparently they all MUST have been late for their appointments, because why else would there be the need to push a pregnant lady out of their way to get in. As I watched the doors close before my eyes, with me still outside of the elevator, I took a quick assessment of the people who beat me into the elevator. It struck me as funny that they were all fairly young, and looked like they were in relatively good health. I even spotted a few pharmaceutical reps with their rolling suitcases. I guess sales must be bad for them to have felt it important to basically bowl me over to get in. So I must surmise that I am doing something wrong. Maybe my independence is coming through, maybe I need to start complaining out loud, or moaning as if I am in labor. I should call the writers from "In the Motherhood" to find out how I can get all the fringe benefits of being a pregnant whale. All I know is if I want a little extra attention, I need to figure it out quickly, because the boys are due any day now!

Do I just give up & give in?

So as my pregnancy has progressed, my husband has constantly reminded me that I am eating for three. At times, I think because of where the boys are located, I am constantly full and really don't have much of an appetite, but I guess, no one has informed the scale of this fact! There are days where I just don't each much. I have watched what I have been eating, but have been known to indulge every once in awhile. So when I went to the doctor's office the other day, I was shocked! Shocked that the scale has moved upward in such a dramatic way. At this point, do I just throw caution to the wind and say "what the hell?" I have watched how eating in moderation has not quite worked for me. So I think for the next few weeks...why not? Why not indulge in that delectable cheesecake? Bring on those Doritos's. Oh yes, I can't wait for some heavenly cheesy nachos. Why not order up those fries smothered in chili? Those yummy chocolate eclairs are calling my name. So yes, I will give up and just give in...because in a few weeks or days, the boys will arrive and it will be a whole different ballgame!

What do you do all day?

Now that I am pregnant with twins and it is becoming closer towards the end of my pregnancy, my doctor has put me on moderate bed rest. What is moderate bed rest? Well, I haven't quite figured that out. I took it as, 1 free pass a day to escape from the house, but apparently that's not the right interpretation. The hardest part for me is just trying to keep still. It is not because I am too uncomfortable to stay in one place, it's just that there is still too much to do before the boy's arrive. So as I wander around the house trying to figure out what needs to be done, deep down I know I should be in bed, but I just can't stay put. As I drive around town doing all my errands, I wonder what my doctor would say. I don't think she would be thrilled. So many people say "oh you must be SO DONE", but quite honestly, I really wish I had another 4-5 months to go. Others say it must be so nice to be catching up on some good Oprah shows, but I haven't watched one yet. A few say how nice it must be to have some down time to read a few good books, but I haven't made a dent in the stack of books on my nightstand. What am I doing? I am working like a madwoman, trying to come up with names for the boys, preparing meals, doing laundry, ironing, running errands, trying to play and be an active part of my daughter's life. I know I must stop. I keep getting reprimanded by my daughter's sitter and my husband. I really don't mean to be causing them so much angst. I know I will look back and think how I should have taken advantage of the mandatory down time...but I have never been one to just relax and veg out, so it is extremely difficult to follow the doctors orders, even though I know I should. Today, I have decided that as soon as I finish my work project, pick names for the boys and paint art for their room, I will stay in bed. Unfortunately, I have a feeling the boys will be born by then!

I am HOT!!!

The things that happen during pregnancy; some things are obvious and some are not. Some things you are told and many things you never hear about until they happen to you.
So why oh why did I forget about the dreaded hot flashes from the last time? Is it that I am hotter because I am pregnant with twins? Is it because I am carrying two boys? Who knows! All I know for sure it that I am tired of sticking to the seat when I get up, tired of feeling like a sweaty pig and tired of worrying about whether I am freezing out the rest of my family because I am so terribly hot. All I know is that it is almost over…at least until menopause.

Hello there Horse Face:)

Why is there such a double standard as to what is acceptable to say to a pregnant woman? If I said half of things that I have heard, I would have been accused of being a crazed, hormonal pregnant lady. So why do people feel that it is okay to say how huge I am, how large my butt has become or even better yet, that I look as if I am going burst, is the doctor sure it’s just twins? Is it me or does this all seem a little rude? I would like to think that it’s a small population of people in this world who feel that it is their right to vocalize whatever they feel. But lately in my outings, it seems as if everyone’s manners have just gone down the drain and they all have a bad case of verbal diarrhea. So here it is right back at you all, everything that I’d like to say but am too polite to follow up with. To the man who addressed me with “Hello Big Mama”. I’d like to say, “Why hello there horse face”. To the woman who followed me around at a cocktail party saying, “You look like you are going to burst”. I’d like to say, “Your face looks like it’s going to fall off, you should have gotten a second opinion”. To the woman who said to me during circle time “Can you actually get up, you look gigantic and your butt is so big, are you carrying a baby back there?” I’d like to say, “The anorexic support group meets every Wednesday evening”. Of course I can’t say what I am truly thinking, nor will I ever. It just brings me pure bliss to fantasize about what would happen if I actually followed through with my thoughts. One thing I know for sure, if I ever did address anyone so rudely, I would be accused of being a hormonal maniac and a crazed pregnant lady. But, at least I’d have an excuse. I wonder what theirs is?????

How much help is really needed?!?

So now that I am expecting twins, I am inundated with questions about how much help I will need. I have found that there are two camps; those that think it will be impossible without a full-time staff, and those who think it will be difficult, but doable. Call me naive... but I am leaning towards the doable. Am I crazy? Well yes, just slightly! I have read and studied most of the twin books available on the market and have come up with a plan. My plan is to get both boy's on the same schedule. Is this possible? Well I don't know, but I am hopeful.

When my daughter was born, I read a great book called Babywise. It became my bible. I read this book over and over, highlighted pages, and made notes in the margins. I truly tribute my daughter's great sleep habits to the information I gained from the book. At 6 months old, she consistently slept from 5:45pm until 7:30am. Yes, I was the envy of many and probably the target on someone's dartboard. As hectic as my days were, I knew it would be over by 5:45pm. That brought me much sanity, well needed down time, and plenty of time to spend with my husband.

I am hopeful that the Babywise program will work for the boys. So, I have ordered a new copy (Don't ever loan it out because you'll never get it back). Now that I have my copy in hand, I am studying up a storm.

In my opinion it should be on every new parent's nightstand. It is a must read!

If you can touch mine, then I can touch yours...

Why is it that once you become pregnant that the whole world decides it’s acceptable to grab, grope & rub your belly. I would never think to go up to a man with hot abs and just start feeling him up. So why does all etiquette go down the drain when someone sees a pregnant lady? The other day I was out and someone I had only met on one occasion before decided to not only rub my belly but also keep her hand placed on it for about 2-3 minutes. Yikes! Very awkward. I had thought I had mastered the block or a quick side twist but the larger I get the harder it is to protect my belly. Why, oh, why…I ask?!? So I have to wonder, what would happen to me if I saw a really nice firm butt and decided to place my hands all over it….hmmm!