A little extra attention...NOT!

The other day I had the opportunity to watch ABC's new Show "In the Motherhood". Although I found the show funny at times, there were parts, I just couldn't relate to. As I watched the character played by Megan Mullally, I was fascinated with the depiction that as a pregnant woman she was able to "work the system" to get more attention, cut to the front of lines and even get someone to buy her coffee. I was reminded of this as I stood in line yesterday, waiting for the elevator at my doctors office. Now you have to understand, I am very, very pregnant. Not only pregnant, but pregnant with twins, so I am extra, extra large. As of recently, belly has began to drop, it is now hanging down to my knees, and there is no mistaking me for anything but pregnant. So, I stood in awe, as the elevator doors opened, I was literally caught up in a stampede to enter. I could not get over how many people appeared out of nowhere and ran into the elevator. Apparently they all MUST have been late for their appointments, because why else would there be the need to push a pregnant lady out of their way to get in. As I watched the doors close before my eyes, with me still outside of the elevator, I took a quick assessment of the people who beat me into the elevator. It struck me as funny that they were all fairly young, and looked like they were in relatively good health. I even spotted a few pharmaceutical reps with their rolling suitcases. I guess sales must be bad for them to have felt it important to basically bowl me over to get in. So I must surmise that I am doing something wrong. Maybe my independence is coming through, maybe I need to start complaining out loud, or moaning as if I am in labor. I should call the writers from "In the Motherhood" to find out how I can get all the fringe benefits of being a pregnant whale. All I know is if I want a little extra attention, I need to figure it out quickly, because the boys are due any day now!

Do I just give up & give in?

So as my pregnancy has progressed, my husband has constantly reminded me that I am eating for three. At times, I think because of where the boys are located, I am constantly full and really don't have much of an appetite, but I guess, no one has informed the scale of this fact! There are days where I just don't each much. I have watched what I have been eating, but have been known to indulge every once in awhile. So when I went to the doctor's office the other day, I was shocked! Shocked that the scale has moved upward in such a dramatic way. At this point, do I just throw caution to the wind and say "what the hell?" I have watched how eating in moderation has not quite worked for me. So I think for the next few weeks...why not? Why not indulge in that delectable cheesecake? Bring on those Doritos's. Oh yes, I can't wait for some heavenly cheesy nachos. Why not order up those fries smothered in chili? Those yummy chocolate eclairs are calling my name. So yes, I will give up and just give in...because in a few weeks or days, the boys will arrive and it will be a whole different ballgame!

What do you do all day?

Now that I am pregnant with twins and it is becoming closer towards the end of my pregnancy, my doctor has put me on moderate bed rest. What is moderate bed rest? Well, I haven't quite figured that out. I took it as, 1 free pass a day to escape from the house, but apparently that's not the right interpretation. The hardest part for me is just trying to keep still. It is not because I am too uncomfortable to stay in one place, it's just that there is still too much to do before the boy's arrive. So as I wander around the house trying to figure out what needs to be done, deep down I know I should be in bed, but I just can't stay put. As I drive around town doing all my errands, I wonder what my doctor would say. I don't think she would be thrilled. So many people say "oh you must be SO DONE", but quite honestly, I really wish I had another 4-5 months to go. Others say it must be so nice to be catching up on some good Oprah shows, but I haven't watched one yet. A few say how nice it must be to have some down time to read a few good books, but I haven't made a dent in the stack of books on my nightstand. What am I doing? I am working like a madwoman, trying to come up with names for the boys, preparing meals, doing laundry, ironing, running errands, trying to play and be an active part of my daughter's life. I know I must stop. I keep getting reprimanded by my daughter's sitter and my husband. I really don't mean to be causing them so much angst. I know I will look back and think how I should have taken advantage of the mandatory down time...but I have never been one to just relax and veg out, so it is extremely difficult to follow the doctors orders, even though I know I should. Today, I have decided that as soon as I finish my work project, pick names for the boys and paint art for their room, I will stay in bed. Unfortunately, I have a feeling the boys will be born by then!

Is anything sacred anymore?

The other evening my husband came home from work with a package that had arrived at his office. As he presented the envelope to me, he said, you won't believe this. My curiosity was peaked and I opened the envelope. In it was a book called "Just say NO, to Circumcision". I had to laugh, since I knew who the sender was, and knew it wasn't a joke. So I have to ask, why is it that once a woman becomes pregnant, it no longer becomes a personal thing? But a common bond, to a few out there,who feel that it is their pregnancy too. Why do so many feel that is okay to push their beliefs or advice on you? Is it that they made so many mistakes during their own parenting, that they now feel that this is their opportunity for a "make-up"? On a daily basis I am asked, are you going to have a natural birth or have an epidural? Will you bottle feed or breast feed? Do you have hemorrhoids or stretch marks? Will you co-sleep or have the babies sleep in another room? Most of the questions are followed up with remedies or suggestions. I do have to say this is the first time the circumcision issue has been brought up, and unfortunately, the closer it comes to when my twin boys arrive, I am sure it won't be the last. So if the people I meet feel that it's okay to express their strong beliefs about my pregnancy and my future decisions, can I express mine right back? Can I ask a man if he was circumcised, and then suggest a book that may make him feel more secure in the gym locker room, if he wasn't? Can I ask the older woman if she has hemorrhoids, and not expect to get smacked across the face? Can I tell the woman in the bad marriage, that she should leave her husband and he's is a cheat? Can I tell the man who is a workaholic, that he should go home and spend quality time with his family, before it's too late? Can I tell another that she lets her daughter wear her skirts too short? I don't think so....I just wish people would think twice before they speak. Is that too much to ask?!? Apparently so.

I would love to give all the people out there, who have made inappropriate comments, a wonderful gift. It's a great book called, "Emily Post's Etiquette.

I am HOT!!!

The things that happen during pregnancy; some things are obvious and some are not. Some things you are told and many things you never hear about until they happen to you.
So why oh why did I forget about the dreaded hot flashes from the last time? Is it that I am hotter because I am pregnant with twins? Is it because I am carrying two boys? Who knows! All I know for sure it that I am tired of sticking to the seat when I get up, tired of feeling like a sweaty pig and tired of worrying about whether I am freezing out the rest of my family because I am so terribly hot. All I know is that it is almost over…at least until menopause.

Pack your bags and be ready to go...

Yikes! At 3o weeks pregnant with twins, I was a little surprised when my doctor said the boys may be making their appearance sooner rather then later. But of course at this point I shouldn't be surprised, nothing has really gone the way the books have said they would. I was told that I would have fatigue and need to take afternoon naps or even the dreaded possibility of bed rest. Not so in my case, if you watch me you'd think I had taken speed. As my husband glances at me from the couch, he begs me to stop because I am making him tired by just watching me. As I frantically try to accomplish everything that a normal person would do in a week into a 2-hour time frame, I just can't stop. I have spent evenings up late labeling things that have no business being labeled. For example my husband's workbench in the garage has been organized and dusted with each section perfectly marked. I know it will become a joke once his buddies see it and the labeling of his stuff will haunt him forever, but do I care. Not at all! I enjoyed every second of the cleaning process. My daughter's playroom, now proudly displays large white labels on everything, giant white Rubbermaid bins, all clearly marked, Puzzles, Crayons, Stickers, and Crafts. As if a two and a half year old could actually read or better yet, put the items back in the correct containers. But what do I care, I feel as if I am accomplishing something useful and for some reason I CAN'T control the strong urge to label. The boys clothing has been washed, folded and of course placed in little baskets, marked oneies's, burp cloths, bibs, swaddle blankets and booties. So am I ready for the boys to be born? The answer quite simply is NO! I don't have any names picked out and there are still more items that need to be labeled. Off to the pantry I go...